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I started the day finding that the furnace was out. It was set on 72 degrees and the temperature in the room was 63. I saw the pilot was out so I called my neighbor Alex. We went down and looked at it and I lit the pilot but it did not fire up. I called my plumber but he was out of town for a few days. His wife gave me the name of another plumber. I walked Danny Boy near the house while I waited for the plumber. Mr. Harris came out and found that a switch needed to be held in to reset the furnace. He also said the furnace was very old and they did not make parts for it anymore. It may continue to have this problem and then not work anymore. Great. I hope it lasts until the end of spring.
I plan to get this house ready to sell and move over to PA, DE, or MD so I can be near my family. The neighborhood here is getting bad and I just want to get the house marketable and get out of here. With out Ted, there is no reason to stay here.
I got a few more things done today. I plugged in the fax machine, sent some faxes, and unplugged it again. I only have one phone line so I have to do that.
I went to the post office and sent a letter off priority and certified. I went to the bank and made some deposits. I took Danny and he barked at the teller.
I decided not to pursue the job because I just do not feel ready. I feel numb and throughout the day, burst into tears. Danny Boy came running down the stair and jumped up next to me to comfort me.
I read some of Ted’s old blog entries and he was so strong and positive. I don’t know how we got from there to here.
I ironed some clothes. Some of Ted’s khaki pants and shirts. Things that he won’t wear ever again. I drove Dasher I today. I thought of Dasher I going to North Jersey’ a trip he won’t be making again. I’ll have to sell Dasher I but not yet. I can’t bring myself to do it. I put Dasher I in my name but that’s as far as I’ll go for now.
I talked to a couple friends and my brother on the phone today. It helps.
Tomorrow, I have to do some work for the business. I hope I can get everything cleaned up.
Danny had his walk this evening and he is waiting for me to come to bed.
News from the Vorlon Wife.
You are strong women with a nice danny boy
and good memories.
Mauricio.
Your next few days are going to be the hardest Karol. You are now alone in the house and will have to push each day to get out of bed and get something done. But, you can do it. We are all here following your daily actions and willing you to go on. That's what Ted would want you to do. He would want you to be safe and happy. I am so glad that you have Danny. Just take each day as it comes the good with the bad. Remember it's ok to cry. Crying is not a sign of weakness. It's natures way to clean the body, getting the stress out of your body and it's healthy. Your are still in my prayers daily. Getting the house ready to sell is going to be a full time job. So pace yourself and try to find something to laugh about each day.
Posted by: Cheryl at March 13, 2007 12:12 AMDear Karol
You have been doing well in geting so much done.
There is more to do and you must stay strong like Ted would want you to do.
If you just remember to take some time when making life altering decisions. Things will work out much better if you give it plenty of thought before acting.
Remember just One Day at a time. May god Bless
We love you friend. Our hearts break for you.
I had a breakfast meeting over at Larrys II this morning at 8:30. On the way over I thought, why didn't I call Karol and have her put the coffee pot on for us at 7:30? You can bet next month, I'll think ahead. We will get together soon.
Posted by: Phyllis E at March 13, 2007 11:04 AMKarol
Thank you for the thank you card and I hope you enjoyed the basket. Ted had given me her card and I thought she would know what you liked. It is going to very hard the next few weeks or months because their is no one there to keep you focused. He was a really great person and will be deeply missed by all. You are in our prayers and may God bless you and comfort you.
Doris
Posted by: Doris Bertolino at March 13, 2007 1:57 PMKarol--I check your blog daily and pray for some comfort during this difficult time. Last year, a friend of mine lost her husband to brain cancer at the age of 47. She told me that after her husband's death she read a book that was a great comfort to her. The book title is "The Year of Magical Thinking" by Joan Didion. The book chronicles Didion's day-to-day life in the year following her husband's death. It's beautifully written and my friend said it made her feel that someone else understood how she felt. They have it at the public library, if you are interested.
As all of your friends and readers have said, take it one day at a time. And take very good care of yourself and Danny Boy--your angel with fur.
Karen